closet vomit

YOU JUST DO AS YOU’RE TOLD

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I feel like I always wear my best and most natural outfits to school. I haven’t talked about it much, but I am a third-year student at Arizona State University in Phoenix, and I am studying journalism and mass communication with a minor in psychology. When I first started university, I was studying to go into pharmacy school, with little direction on what I genuinely wanted to do. But, after learning what the industry was like, as well as failing the same math class three times, I realized that I didn’t want to peddle drugs behind a counter for a living, that I needed a creative job that allowed me to channel the things that I love the most into a career.

I thought that I would gradually realize what I wanted to do, but that wasn’t the case at all. The last week of my first year of college, just barely beginning to come out of a wave of depression and having started my blog a handful of months earlier, I realized I needed to find a new path for myself. I sat in solitude, with a pen and paper, and I wrote down all the things I knew I was good at and loved doing. I remember what I wrote: writing, photographing, blogging, fashion, design… and I wondered to myself what career I could possibly channel these things into. Then it hit me in the face.

I called my dad frantically and he attributed my sudden actualization to extreme levels of stress and behavioral fluctuations. But I knew this was something else. Everything I thought I loved about studying pre-med turned out to reflect my actual passions: I thought I loved my biology class, but I realized that I enjoyed the adrenaline rush of fast-paced and organized note-taking (which I gave to my friends who chose to sleep through every lecture), not the topics. I thought that I just happened to be better at statistics than calculus, but I realized that I enjoyed it because I loved using math that applied to real situations. By studying in a program that was so far off from my actual interests, I learned so much more about myself.

I don’t think that I am necessarily 100% inclined toward creativity and writing, though. There are areas of science that I do genuinely have an enthusiasm towards. I still have a minor in psychology, because I love studying abnormal cases and I love observing and understanding neuroscience. I wrote a 15-page paper on metaphysics and dualism, and it is the assignment I am most proud of. Calculating normal models is kind of my shit. However, none of these things compare to the satisfaction that I feel studying how to communicate with audiences by the written word.

Okay, about the outfit… this has been my comfy go-to look the past week or two. I love my TOPSHOP ribbed turtleneck, as well as my LEVI’S black high-waisted skinnies. I paired this with my DEENA & OZZY leather oxfords, and, since I don’t really accessorize, I added a little extra dimension to the outfit by wearing my cream-colored URBAN OUTFITTERS lace-trim socks. The bag that you see is my vintage 1970’s ADIDAS bag, which I found at a vintage market for $20, and I am super proud of it. I use it every day for school, and it complements every outfit I own.

That’s about it for this post, hope you enjoyed my rant about my education! xxx

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PHOTOS BY CODY PAYNE